sumtimes i get so frusterated in myself cuz i cant 4get..i try so hard 2 jus let her go..but i can’t…my feelings remain the same, unchanging, strong feelings that i’ve had…I get so frusterated because I’m tryin hard to let go, I dnt enjoy feeling sad or lonely but seems like the more I try, the more I fail. I’ve even found myself at times wanting to approach her and ask her for a chance..jus a chance 4 me to show her that none of my feelings were fake, and that I’m genuine…sometimes i wish she would wake up and actually miss me and want me back..

i get frustrated wit myself..because i cant seem to let go…even after everything..my feelings towards her r still the same, I pray to God for him to watch over her and protect her…sometimes i dont understand y everytime it seems as if i found sum1 who actually cares for me..it jus ends in the same way…my heart has gone through so much pain…im scared that eventually im gonna end up shuting down =/…i like the person that I am…but @ da same time i hate it @ times cuz im vulnerable to gettin hurt because i trust to easily…and all i get in return is a needle of pain shoved into my heart…I’ve told friends not to bottle things up, and I try to keep to my advice for the most part, but i feel like a lot of the emotional pain I have endured over the years has jus been buildin up in side of me, and im afraid that one day I will let it all out on the wrong people or the people I love.  Sometimes i hate bein one of thos “sensitive” “good” “nice” guys..u wud think dats wat a girl wants..but @least in my experience it hasnt been the case.

When i see her I tell myself < Luis you gave it a shot theres nothing you can do , jus let her go..u deserve better, someone dat appreciates you for who you are, someone who will not run away at ur mistakes but embrace them and help you work through them >..but it frustrates me that a part of me refuses to see things that way and won’t let her go….Aaaaaaa!!! y do things have 2 b so complicate??

I jus pray that when she meets some1 dat loves her as much as I did or even more dat she will b able to give him a chance..and dat he treats her wit da respect she deserves, cuz even though she hurt me, she deserves nothin but the best. I jus pray that whatever it is she is holding in her heart, dat she can let it go…I pray that I don’t turn my frustration on the ppl I love…

God I NEED U!!!